I wrote my name down on the volunteers form, then ticked the YES box.
It will be fun, what a great activity.
I am so heavily committed right now, do I really have time?
I included a little note on the side. My out clause. “If you get enough helpers I am happy to miss out.”
Really, what is with that?????
Did I just say yes and then hoped they would say no?
That was it, The Sign, The Warning Warning…….. I was saying yes out of obligation not out of devotion.
I really wanted to say no.
Today I checked the volunteers list and yes there is my name, they need me, I am in. Well off course you dill, you ticked yes.
I do still have a choice, I can make up an excuse, hang on I have an excuse, I am busy, I am over committed, I really wanted to say no.
Yes, I can pull out now, I can be a flake.
I can devote and honour my commitment.
Little voice is saying “you are too busy, should have said no, when will you learn.”
As I listen to little voice I know I will show up. I will show up with a bucketful of resentment if I keep listening.
How do I show up and leave resentment behind, along with frustration and the ever building cranky pants.
Let’s switch it around, let’s set up a challenge.
Let’s frame it like this:
I am going to show up and learn a new skill
I am going to show up and meet someone new
I am going to show up and have fun with creativity
I am going to show up and be proud
I am going to show up with all my enthusiasm, my joy and my creativity.
I am going to leave with a new friend, a new skill and a feeling of Bliss.
I will leave knowing I ditched my frustration, found my devotion and did not flake.
Do you over commit? Are you a flaker or devoter?
PS. Next time if I am not all in from the beginning, when I am thinking of the out clause before I begin. That is the time to say no, and that my friends is okay.
This is day 17 of my 31 Days of Captured Bliss